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burning like matchsticks in the face of the darkness
 
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Friday, September 20th, 2002

Time Event
1:45p
I hate ergonomic keyboards. I really do.

I am at work and my boss is at lunch and the filing is done except for the stuff i need to ask her about and she said i could read a book except for the fact that of course i didn't bring one since on Wednesday (my first real day at work) i actually had stuff to do for all 3 hours.

So here i am, wishing i were at home writing a real LiveJournal update, but instead getting paid to catch up on my friendslist. I guess i should do something productive like do the Plato reading for my mythology class that's up on CourseInfo so i can actually write the paper that's due on Monday. Sigh.

I still hate this ergonomic keyboard.
2:55p
oddly accurate
http://www.freewillastrology.com/horoscopes/cancer.html

Cancer Horoscope for week of September 19, 2002

I feel famished as I think of you stewing in your bottomless hunger, Cancerian. You almost remind me of an anorexic beauty queen or a fasting saint or a mother sparrow who can only find enough worms to feed her babies but not herself. And yet I know your longing is not a desperate craving for food. Nor is it a yearning for impossible love or superhuman power or unrealistic miracles. You're starving, you're ravenous, you're mad for something you don't have a name for yet -- a real and achievable something whose existence you've just begun to tune into.
3:23p
"when you're a big star, tell me, will you miss the earth?"
I understand now why i'm getting $7/hr here when i get $10/hr at home. Michele would never let me just sit around the computer (and Irene sure as hell wouldn't). At the library there is always stuff to be done, but here it's mostly just filing. The phone almost never rings. I hear the filing system is in need of repair, but it hasn't seemed too horrible to me, and i'm not about to just plunk myself down and just start going through it. Honestly, i much prefer being useful all the time, though, as opposed to just being a warm body at a desk. But then again, i am odd. Layna says i'm only the person she knows besides Adas who can audit a class; most everyone just drops stuff they're not getting credit for. For me, though, it's not about the credits, it's about the learning. It's also not about the grades, which can be problematic. And i can't articulate exactly how these two are part of the same mentality, but i know they are.

The amount of paper generated by this office is terrifying. E-mails get printed out and most everything gets multiple copies made of it so copies can go in various different files. It almost makes me sick. The sheer amount of paper generated at this institution in general makes me queasy, actually.
5:50p
song to not listen to
"Lightning Crashes" 9-11 tribute version

This is me, wiping away the tears now.
6:28p
just so y'all know...
i was being serious in that last entry. Sorry if anyone was confused by the potentially sarcastic tone.
11:49p
"Girl Power" mix so far
If He Tries Anything - Ani DiFranco
I Love Myself Today - Bif Naked
Blessings - Dar Williams
Getting In Touch With My Inner Bitch - Christine Lavin
What's the Matter - Catie Curtis
Louise - Beth Amsel
Sistersong - Rachael Sage
Love is All Around - Joan Jett


This tracklist is about half as long as i would like it to be. Any suggestions?

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