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burning like matchsticks in the face of the darkness
 
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Friday, August 15th, 2003

Time Event
6:32a
"i've got a vision of blue sky and dry land"
After dinner i went to the creperie (Cleo?) with Michelle, Chloe, Anne Marie, and Christina. Wow those are expensive. I spent ten dollars on a dessert. Only because it was the last night was this okay. £5.60 for a crepe banane chocolat and £1.80 for a hot chocolate, plus a pound tip. At least it was yummy. (And their hot chocolate is really good. *remembers the Lamont hot chocolate machine and drools*)

It's interesting listening to people talk about other people. And it reminds me that my judgements of people need to be grounded in my own experience with them, because there will always be people i like who dislike each other.

Around 11:30 a lot of us went to DTM. The music wasn't as good as last night, but they played some stuff i definitely didn't expect: "Backstreet's Back" and Madonna's "Like a Prayer." The Madonna was absolutely the best part of the night. I've gotten into dancing to the kind of music DTM plays, but i was all over "Like a Prayer" and even Long-Haired Brian danced and that made me happy and he has grace/rhythm, which is always hotness. No Kieran, but we got a pitcher of sangria (of which i had a little) and something which Alice or Christina thought was Sex-on-the-Beach (of which i had a glass).

Around quarter to one we headed over to Mood. We had a nice reserved section so we lounged on grey leather seats and i watched people get so very drunk. The dance floor was packed, but at one point i did venture over there with Jenny. I didn't like the music, though, and she was dancing with one of her guy friends, so i was just kinda dancing, but not all that well since there was so little space. Then this kinda strange-looking guy started dancing with me. Okay, whatever. It began to seem like the fact that he was dancing with me was some sort of show for his friends, and i didn't like the music/crowdedness anyway, so i make my way through the crowded masses back to our lounge area. Thankfully i was followed by no hassle.

It was tempting to just leave and go home (probably to bed), but this was the last night and i do really enjoy the company of a lot of these people. And i did get to talk to Brian and Ken some, which was good. And then after we left around 2 we some of us went to the kebab vans on St. Giles and ate on the monument and then hung out outside my staircase and then in the computer lab.

I really value what i've gained academically here, and i have fun anecdotes and have done lots of touristy things with postcards and photographs to boot, but what i value most is the friendships i've made, the wonderful people i've discovered and hope to keep in touch with.

I made the mistake of saying "LiveJournal is the best thing ever" tonight. Of course this is not true, and usually i'm careful to be aware of the meaning/implications of what i say and to fully mean what i say, but admittedly sometimes i'm prone to exaggeration. Ken said that the best thing ever is someone who loves you unconditionally. I agree. It makes me sad to hear someone say there are 2 people who love him/her unconditionally. I know my parents absolutely love me unconditionally, but i would like to think that a lot of other people do as well. I don't share everything about myself with everyone, but deep love looks beyond aspects which may elicit disapproval to the person as a whole. (This is something i definitely struggle with with certain relationships.) I'm not being particularly articulate, partly because i don't especially want to get into specific examples, but yeah. This deserves its own entry, on what love means and the different kinds of love and a hierarchy of personal characteristics (both in people's own perceptions of themselves and people's perceptions of other people).

I learned that not only is Chloe on my flight home (doesn't depart until 6:05pm, but it's a direct to Boston, 7 hours and 15 minutes on a Boeing 777 jet, arriving at 8:20pm) but Long-Haired Brian is as well. Yaynish. And i have terminal info, woo hoo.

A lot of people are sad about the program ending. As i've said before, i've had a great time and am really glad i did it (much more glad than i thought i would be), but i have so much to look forward to when i get back. The usual: back in America with all that that means (e.g. my money meaning what i think it means, being in the same time zone as most of my people), seeing loved ones again, having my own computer and real AIM, but mostly it's all about Smith. ("This is About Smith." *snerks*) English Department Liaison, Lamont House SAA (Student Acadamic Advisor), weekly editorial for The Sophian [Title suggestions?]. And of course, seeing lots of people, meeting new people, my room, so many things i love about Smith/Northampton.

An incomplete list of more specific items follows:
  • Homecoming dinner with Grandma Saturday night.
  • Pool party at the Pioccones' Sunday afternoon.

  • Monday: Returning all my books to the library and picking up more books (and movies). I think i'm working that day, too.

  • Smith Club thingie in Needham: Friday, August 22

  • My uncle taking me back to the Valley: Sunday, August 24
  • Moving back into my real Smith room: August 29

  • Common Rotation show at the Iron Horse, September 5 (or October 10 if for some reason we can't get tickets) because as the lady says, "we can't let a recurring Buffy actor be 2 minutes walking distance away and NOT go."

Yay for incoming Lamonsters who know how to stalk. (She found me through LJ and IMed me. I of course in turn plugged her into LJ.) And she's living in my first year room! Craziness.


Mrr. Shower at 7, then to breakfast, then to finish packing. Am beginning to get hungry now, though. Am also beginning to get tired. I had an overnight flight over here and was little jet-lagged and adjusted well to the time zone shift. I think regardless of whether i sleep on the plane or not my sleep schedule will be fucked for a couple days.

Roommate has already left. Never said goodbye to her because we thought we would see each other before she left. I'll probably e-mail her at some point. She was definitely a cool person/roommate. We've talked these past few days about how people are all "Yeah, we'll stay in touch" but it mostly isn't going to happen. I never had such delusions, but it'll be interesting to see how it goes. There are definitely people i want to keep in touch with who seem not very reciprocatory.

Current Mood: hello all-nighter

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