June 3rd, 2005

big girl world

week-end update

The short version:
  • Bartender training is like an intensive pseudo-immersion foreign language course.  I managed to get certified, though.
  • Shopping for business professional clothes is a bitch.
  • I really love learning stuff and engaging my brain.
  • I still desperately want to be a full-fledged adult (i.e. an apartment and a job to pay for it) and am working toward it.
  • I kind of want to just curl up in front of my computer and read fanfic for days.

The long version: Collapse )

Reminder: graduation party at my house this Saturday. [And by "this Saturday" i mean "Next Saturday, June 11." Oops.]

And for any area peoples who didn't read behind the cut, i'd love volunteers to scope out bars with me as i seek employ.  (You don't have to be 21+ to accompany me.)

Oh, and i think i'm gonna go to Laughing Wild this coming Thursday (provided there are still tickets, of course).  Last call for accompaniment.
loneliness suspended to our own

entry #2000

That i've made this many entries doesn't surprise me now like i suspect it would have a little over 3 years ago when i first got an LJ and only knew a handful of people on LJ.  Though looking back over my anniversary posts, i seem to average about 700 posts/year every year.

Once upon a time, truepenny wrote a manifesto.  I tend to look back at it on anniversaries, to affirm and remind myself of my ideal.
This is my mantra: I am writing these posts on the tails of an armada of kites--dragonflies and cranes and glorious dragons--and letting the kites go. If someone else finds one of my kites, reads the post, and enjoys it, that's fantastic. If they send a kite back to me, that's even better. But the point is not the answer; the point is sending the kites in the first place. (In other words, the LJ is not a popularity contest. I will not obsess about it.)

Pursuant to this conceptualization, I am making myself three promises.

1. I will not dumb myself down or apologize for being smart.

2. I will not be embarrassed or defensive about liking something which other people think is a piece of shit, or vice versa.

3. I will choose what I want to write about but I will not censor myself. My vocabulary can range across as many registers as it damn well pleases. I will not be afraid to say what I think.

I try to always be conscious that anyone could be reading this, and i don't f'lock any entries (for a variety of reasons).  If you wanna lurk or if you wanna add this journal, go ahead.  If what i'm writing no longer fits your interests and you wanna take me off, go ahead.  I read everyone i have friended, so i tend to project and assume that everyone who has me added reads me regularly, though i realize that many people read with filters, and i try to remind myself that that is their perogative.  And i put pretty much my entire life on this thing, so i promise i won't be offended if you skim over stuff that doesn't interest you.  Even obsessive completionist me sometimes skims entries on her flist.

I've been in one of my "I hate everybody" moods recently.  I'm an obsessive completionist and read every person on my flist (though i frequently filter out communities due to time constraints) and am thinking perhaps it's time to prune.  I'm always torn between being a nosy whore for knowledge and thinking "Well what am i getting out of having this person on my reading list?"  And yes i do see the irony in the fact that Little Miss "Everyone should engage in dialogue withe people who don't agree with them, and maybe even friendships will be formed" hates most people.