June 6th, 2005

(hidden) wisdom

on the necessity of meaning (and some other stuff)

[long overdue entry]

Reading Carol Ochs' Our Lives as Torah: finding God in our own stories, i kept feeling twitchy around the idea that it was necessary for life to have meaning in the sense of there needing to be a God, even though what finally calmed me down from my panic about my interview was giving it all over to God and i personally so need a Creator God who is intimately involved in my life.  I know this about myself and have for years, that for my own sanity i need to believe that there is a Greater Someone whom i can turn to.  But the idea that everyone needs this has made me tetchy recently.

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"He invented eating.  He likes matter.  He invented it." -C. S. Lewis on God (in Mere Christianity)
I thought of sk8eeyore -- among others -- when i read that.
small girl in big world [_extraflamey_]

on church community

[long overdue entry the second]

sk8eeyore and i have discussed the purpose of church, specifically church community, a number of times before, and i have long intended to make an entry of my own on the subject.  Recent discussion over in wisdomeagle's LJ has been bringing up rage issues for me [discussion is managing to hit all my buttons; i don't actually have rage at Ari], so i'm finally doing this.

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In other news, i have a cute pair of cross earrings a friend made for me but which i'm unlikely to wear.  (Look at me go with my discomfort with professing a faith i'm not sure i have.)  I'd like them to go to a good home, though.  Any takers?
one girl in all the world

"Gold teeth and a curse for this town were all in my mouth."

My brother and i spent a good 2 hours on webtender.com Saturday night.  He had been flipping through my DrinkMaster book and joked that with all the crazy drink names that exist, you could probably order a "laundry basket."  Well, we couldn't find that one, but there is a fruit basket and a royal laundry.  Having looked at a lot of the drink names that come up when you plug in things like Jager and 151, he also thinks there should be a "bowling ball to the nuts."  So now he has to figure out what they would contain so once he's of age he can come into my bar and order them :)

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Browsing Tiffany thanks to antheia, i found the most expensive ring i have ever seen.  I am irked that the website doesn't tell you how many carats the diamonds you're looking at are.

Flipping through my brother's yearbook, i saw in the superlatives the "Ideal Husband & Wife" are two guys -- one in a halter top dress with a floral bouquet.  This makes me happy.  I'm sure it's a joke, but the fact that they're down with joking like/about that makes me happy.

NHS had a bright sunny day for graduation the first time in ages.  Personally i could have done without the temps verging on 90 and will be glad to see this cold front come.  There were almost no traditional humanities majors -- two English and one History.  A bunch of journalism, visual/performing/musical arts, criminal justice/international affairs/etc., and so on.  The way the commencement exercises work is, they read your name, people clap/cheer, Mr. U. says where you're going after NHS.  Two are going into the armed forces, which prompted a second clap/cheer for each of them, which i thought was interesting.  One is going to college in Venezuela, which prompted a murmur.  One's going into massage therapy, and one's going to Boston Bartending in the fall.  Joe DeGeorge is deferring his biotechwhatever major at Clark a year to tour with Harry and the Potters.

No one who knows me will ever ask me to give a commencement type address.  Dr. Q. gave the same advice he gives every year: to get to know your parents as people, saying you'll be surprised at what nice people they are.  I adore my parents and this part of his speech has never fazed me before, but coming as it did on the heels of my father mentioning a graduate whose parents' breakup was really rough for him, i thought, "But what if your parents aren't good people?"  And throughout the speeches, there was much "This class is so wonderful blahdyblah" and hi, there are amazing kids in every class, and there are shitty kids in every class, and there are a lot of medium kids, and there are kids who are just doing the amazing stuff to get somewhere better, and there are kids doing lots of amazing stuff that you don't even know about.  Plus, Dr. Q. said he doesn't remember what the speaker said when he graduated, and he doubted the graduates seated here would remember what he said either, but he still talked for 10 minutes.  This irked me.

So here's what i would give as a high school commencement address.  Collapse )

Catching up on su_herald i'm underwhelmed by the fic.  Le sigh.  ‘S not like i don't have pages of recs to check out anyhow.

I think if i were to have a Garden State icon, it would be a cap of her dancing in front of the fire, or of him playing with the necklace.