December 2nd, 2008

(hidden) wisdom

"but those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength"

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Sunday evening I was tired, and I was conscious of how similar it felt to feeling emo, which was interesting.
Monday I was just tired.
I went to bed before 10pm Monday night, so I was better today, but I am skipping econ class tonight because I am still somewhat tired and class is boring and I want to go to bed proper early because I would like to be maximally functional for RED class tomorrow (for which I have done no prep), CAUMC group on Thursday, and Handel's Messiah with my mom on Friday.

I got an email today: "It's time to think spring at Harvard Extension School. [...] Search the most current courselist"  I am NOT allowing myself to take any classes next semester unless there is something super-awesome.  Most of the religion classes I'd really be interested in are on Thursdays, which means they're off the table anyway.

I hear it got up to like 60F outside yesterday.  I did not set foot outside between about 9am and 5pm, so I can neither confirm nor deny.  But we did walk outside to get lunch today, which pleased me.  (Highs in the 40s today.)

I met LEM-Jeff at Crema Cafe after work yesterday.  [I got a Sweet Potato sandwich -- it had apples and hummus and stuff; I approve.  Sprouts in sandwiches are slightly awkward, but they make me think of Perks in Norwood, which is happy nostalgia.  And they give you your sandwich in a basket like at Perks, too.]

Over the holiday, Laurel said she thought he liked me -- 'cause he emailed me as soon as he got home to say, it was great to meet me and we should hang out sometime.  I pointed out that he had spent most of the night talking to her (not that I was saying they had chemistry) and he probably just wanted to drop me a line before he forgot/lost my email address.  However, when I saw him at Crema Cafe I couldn't help thinking, "yum" -- blond hair about to his shoulders, this nice red shirt loose over a more fitted black shirt, blue jeans ... it's a look that really works for him, and on Wednesday he talked about having found a personal style that he feels really comfortable in which probably helps.  I hugged him when he greeted me, like without even thinking, which is kind of weird because I tend more toward holding back and gauging people's comfort levels even when I totally feel comfortable hugging them.

Last night, Ari was telling me about how her Lutheran church is doing a Taize-style service Thursday evenings during Advent, and I laughed because I had told Jeff my trajectory from "I'm going to go downstairs and help take care of the small children during the service because the pastor's sermon puts me to sleep" to "all church, all the time," which included a Taize-style evening prayer service at the Lutheran church around the corner from my parents' on Thursday evenings while I was living at home after college and how after I moved I missed it even though I knew it wasn't really worth hustling out for, and then CAUMC young adult small group moved its weekly evening meeting from Monday to Thursday.  I was telling Ari how I could probably use more of that [meditational prayer services] in my life (since I approach church so academically rather than devotionally) and I came home to a facebook invite to Taize Service for Advent at Harvard-Epworth UMC . . . ON THURSDAYS.

I want to do more church-hopping now that Ari's conveniently put together a 6-axis scale (liturgy, music, welcome, preaching, communion, GLBT-affirming).  [for my reference, locked entry here]

I dunno.  I've been going to CHPC on Sunday mornings since *checks* February 4, 2007 (I first went* Nov. 26, 2006 as part of my ecumenical Advent) but I don't really feel strongly committed.  I stayed largely 'cause they kept doing book study type stuff (which is always a draw for me), but there's been less of that recently.  The young adults had lunch on Sunday (at Mr. Crepe -- yay!) and folks were talking about how much energy there is in the church, and possibly it's just that the energy is directed at stuff that doesn't interest me, but I don't especially feel that.  I do like a number of the people, but I feel awkward at Coffee Hour and largely just stand around (this has been a fairly recent development -- possibly because Alex has moved to PA and Rachel is often not here and when she is she's talking to other people).

Of course, I still don't have an answer for what I would be looking for were I to go church-shopping.  CWM feels like the closest thing to a church home, so I wouldn't even be searching so much for that as I was the first time around (though I'm not sure I was consciously searching for a "church home" back when I was first church-hopping).

*sidebar: looking back at that entry, it's interesting how I've acclimated to stuff.  I wrote
The words to the Gloria were printed in the bulletin and I wasn't thrilled with the gender neutralization but I ended up not singing it at all because it was very up-tempo and I couldn't really follow it.
(Words: "Glory to God the Creator, and to the Christ, and to the Holy Spirit: as it was in the beginning, is now, and will be forever. Amen.")
and now I do that Gloria without even thinking.


Any time I pull up my LJ (which is a lot) I'm hit by my future-dated post, which I think is a good thing -- especially if I make myself actually read it, rather than just glancing at the image and going on to whatever I was pulling up the page for.

The people that walked in darkness have seen a great light. And they that dwell in the land of the shadow of death, upon them hath the light shined. (Isaiah IX, 2 ... from Handel's Messiah)

[Massachusetts legalizes same-sex marriage; Red Sox win first World Series in 86 years.]

I'm reading When the Drama Club is not Enough: Lessons from the Safe Schools Program for Gay and Lesbian Students while the dryer goes.

From the Introduction:
[...] January 1989, when the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services released its Report of the Secretary's Task Force on Youth Suicide.  The report stated that 30 percent of youth suicides are committed by gay, lesbian, and bisexual youth.  [...]
    Not long after this report was published, the gay and lesbian community in Massachusetts found itself in unusual election-year circumstances.  The two gubernatorial candidates, Republican William Weld and Democrat John Silber, were in a close contest.  Vying for the gay vote, Weld promised he would, if elected, address the problem of youth suicide and support pending legislation to establish a commission to study the needs of gay and lesbian youth.  If the legislature did not pass the bill, he further promised that he would establish a commission by executive order.  Silber, who had been a vocal opponent of gay and lesbian rights, was silent on this issue.  True to his word, after he was elected, Governor Weld created the Governor's Commission on Gay and Lesbian Youth and swore in the appointed members, charging them with finding ways to reduce the high rate of suicide among gay and lesbian youth and to prevent the violence perpetrated against them.
That election was in 1990, when I was seven years old, and he served for six years.  I have vague memories of the Weld-Kerry debates six years later (when I was in seventh grade), but I couldn't actually tell you why I liked William Weld.  But I did.  Probably the only politician I will ever like -- and given my detail-oriented critique mode nowadays, even that probably wouldn't survive if I went back and actually paid attention now.