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burning like matchsticks in the face of the darkness
 
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Wednesday, December 31st, 2008

Time Event
8:10a
Yes, I've totally been drafting this entry all year.
(But who posts early?  I first saw an end-of-year meme on Dec. 21 -- Dec. 22 the poster's time, but still.  People kept posting that survey that asks stuff like, "Did anyone close to you die this year?" and Ari and I are like, "The year is not over yet!  You can't answer that question yet!"  I'm posting this now because I'm meeting the bff in a couple hours, and we'll be spending approximately 24 hours together, so I'm not likely to be online again before the New Year -- except of course for the referencing which will inevitably come up during our conversations.)

My mother once referred to 2006 as the year I was "launched."  As 2007 drew to a close, I deemed 2007 the year I "settled" (as in, the year I settled into my post-college adult life).

Early in 2008, I deemed 2008 the year I "grew up."  ("Growing up" is, of course, a constant work in progress, and this year reminded me how foolish it is to make such declarations.  That thing about wisdom being knowing how much you don't know?  Yeah, I think maturity works much the same way -- realizing how far you have to go is a sign of maturity.)

The (first six months of the) year ended up containing a lot more painful maturing than I'd at first anticipated.  I learned a lot about who I am, about how to be in relationship, and about patience.  I am also immensely grateful for mjules' presence in my life, as she was one of the best people I could have had during that ongoing drama -- and we turned out to be really good friends even beyond that.

In other news: blah blah blah ... bullet points from the yearCollapse )

I'm really hesitant around ideas of "What would you do differently if you could go back and do-over?" (I wouldn't be the person I am now if I hadn't had those experiences and the experiential learning that comes with that), but Monday evening I was thinking, "What advice would I give my January-self?" (er, my January-2008 self) and what it came down to was: "Ask for what you want" -- which maps onto lots of things.  Ask to give someone a hug.  Ask for a clarifying conversation.  Ask that interesting new person for their contact info.  Etc.
8:11a
in other news...
There are times when I'm in church and actually cannot think of prayer requests, but usually it's just that I don't feel like lifting up the ones I have (because I say the same ones all the time, because I don't know how to condense a story, etc.).  It makes me sad that our lists of Concerns are almost always (significantly) longer than our lists of Joys, but it weirds me out when very few people say anything at all.

This post brought to you by the seemingly never-ending list of things to be concerned about re: people I care about.

[Also: I agreed to check work email over the break, because I am a rockstar like that, but why do the actual work requests have to come in right before I get a bff day?]
8:36a
and the snow's starting
Yesterday, Terry said something about how it was supposed to snow all day today and I was like, "Huh?"  Yeah, I often only look one day ahead on the weather forecast.  I didn't see anything when I got up this morning, but glancing out the window now, I see bits of white falling.
8:29p
Secret Slasha
secret_slasha = live.  If I'm counting right, the stats are 8 f/f to 9 m/m.

I need to not do Secret Slasha next year, 'cause I keep writing not good fic.

I forget exactly what I requested, but I got Dawn/Olivia ("Jewel Mirror") by overthetiber.  Not a pairing I would have ever considered (which is saying something, right?) but I love both characters, so I was excited to read it.  Definitely some interesting stuff going on there, and some really outstanding bits.

Edit: The next story I read was the one written for Ari: "Unto the Breach" by Dolores -- Jenny/Joyce (another pairing I never would have thought of). Bravo.

Edit2: Shockingly (ha), the third fic I read was the first listed fic Ari wrote: "Amazing Grace" (Nina/Tara), which I also really like.

Yay for pairings I wouldn't have thought of, and ways of doing them that I wouldn't have thought of, and well-written to boot.

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