Am working through some structural changes on said fic.
The title steals from Eliot's "Prufrock," but the section headings are Biblical lines. Rereading "Prufrock" I'm surprised at how many sections of the poem fit the fic. Neither protagonist is much like Prufrock, though, so I'm wary of too obviously structuring the fic around that poem. The Biblical heading lines aren't all that important, and the one I'm really attached to can be worked into the fic itself (and I find myself thinking that this would actually make that particular section stronger). And this is probably an impossible question to respond to if you don't actually know the fic, but humor me?
Questions people are more likely to be able to help with:
Minimal rewriting could leave the end reveal a surprise to the reader as it is to one of the main characters. The fic is dark and f*cked-up, so the squicky pairing reveal shouldn't be an issue -- though it's totally gonna be archived at pairing-specific sites where this point will be mooted. I know I hate cryptic teasers where I don't know who's in the fic and being unclear all through until the reveal at the end... okay, I'll make this easy(er) for you: a poll.
dark fucked-up fic with squicky pairing: tick your personal preferences
and okay, I'll poll the Prufrock question, too
And here's the really easy question: Selling a sibling into slavery in order to obtain a powerful position... is there any actual myth of this?