Elizabeth Scripturient (the delinquent, ecumenical (hermionesviolin) wrote,
Elizabeth Scripturient (the delinquent, ecumenical

How I Met Your Mother 1.19 "Mary the Paralegal" [watched on tape: 2006-09-30]

I've never understood the idea that prostitution is the oldest profession (or that adultery is the oldest sin).

Anyway.  When Mary first showed up I actually assumed Barney had just called some chick from his building to come be Ted's date.  And of course her comment about prostitution was a major tip-off that she was not in fact a prostitute.  Oh, Ted, insisting that she's a prostitute rather than right away saying "Barney told me you were a hooker he paid $500 to come out with me tonight."  LOVE his revenge, though.

Also, wow harsh Robin so blatantly saying that Ted is not among her friends (in her LAMA acceptance speech) -- plus of course the added insult to injury of naming Sandy Rivers (hee! Marshall sticking stuff in his hair) among her friends.

[quotes from tv.com]

Barney: (To Ted) Do you have some puritanical hang up on prostitution? Dude, it’s the world’s oldest profession.
Marshall: Do you really think that’s true?
Barney: Oh yea, I bet even Cro-Magnons used to give cave hookers an extra fish for putting out.
Marshall: Ah ha, so the oldest profession would be fishermen. Kaboom! You’ve been lawyered!

Barney: That’s adorable Ted. You’re such a hayseed. The companionship business is the growth industry of the 21st century. You do realize that 1 out of every 8 adult women in America is a prostitute.
Marshall: Dude you just made that up.
Barney: Withdrawn.
Marshall: Lawyered!

Barney: Do it! Come on Ted, do it! It's one of those things you have to do before you turn 30.
Ted: What? Sleep with a prostitute?
Barney: No, lose your virginity! What Up!

Lily: You know, Barney, for anyone else, this would be a new low but sadly for you, it’s just a new middle.
"Well, my days of not taking you seriously are certainly coming to a middle."

Barney: Dude your views on professional fornicators are harshing my mellow.

Barney: Good day! (leaving)
Ted: (as Barney stands there, Ted starts laughing) You’re just waiting for me to say something so you can interrupt.
Barney: (As he stomps out, screaming) I SAID GOOD DAY!

Also from tv.com:

Mary the Paralegal says she works at the law firm "Douglas, O'Halloran and Stamp". These are the last names (Sarah Douglas, Jack O'Halloran, Terence Stamp) of the actors playing the three Kryptonite villains in Superman II.
Tags: tv: how i met your mother, tv: how i met your mother: episodes

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